One foot in, one foot out

Crossover cowboys. That’s the term I’ve coined this week for people who don’t bother to finish their current relationship before embarking on a new one. Brazen beyond the pale, smug in the belief there’s no chance of capture and operating by logic inexplicable to anyone but themselves, crossover cowboys are to the dating world what great white sharks are to a beach full of carefree swimmers. Only instead of losing a leg, you’re at risk of losing your heart AND your self-respect.
I met one such cowboy a few years ago. He was Mr Keen, asking for my number quicker than I could say, My what lovely spurs you have – then promptly offering to take me to lunch. After plying me with the better part of a bottle of wine he freely admitted he’d booked a hotel room right near the restaurant because he ‘liked to enjoy weekends away in the city’. The fact that Mr Keen lived a two-minute drive from the CBD should really have been the tip-off but it wasn’t until date three and his refusal to allow me into his flat because it was too messy (translation: I’d rather not introduce you to my girlfriend right now) that I twigged. This dude was a down and dirty ratfink and it was time I beat a hasty retreat.
Much like Max, the guy my friend Eliza met last Friday night. He too, was keen, asking her to have dinner with him the following evening. He texted her the next morning, asking if he could meet her for lunch AND dinner, because, he just, you know, liked her soooooooo much. She smelled a rat and checked out his Facebook page, whereupon friends had left messages like, ‘Hey man, I hear you got your girl an engagement ring – wicked! Any plans for how you’ll pop the question?’
She texted him back with the pithy but appropriate, ‘Will have to pass on dinner Max – maybe sometime when you’re not sort of engaged to be married?’
His panicked reply: ‘I’ve not been happy and thought maybe I could just get to know you and see what happens.’
Translation: Want to be my last hurrah before I tie the knot?
I know, I know. I’m a cynic. But really, these crossover cowboys have it coming. I might launch another blog naming and shaming which should make things interesting on the dating circuit.

*** Ever been a victim of a crossover cowboy? Spill the beans, gang. Naming optional.